Paraphrasing
Paraphrasing consists of restating in your own words what another person’s statement
means to you. When you paraphrase, you are basically telling the other person:
“What I think you are saying is . . .”
Sometimes, however, telling someone: “What I think you are saying is . . .” can
sound a bit demeaning or snobbish. You might want to consider using something like
the one of these statements before you paraphrase. (The “. . .” in each of
the following indicates the paraphrase of the other person’s message; that is, your
own words .)
Use of paraphrasing provides the speaker with a good indication of how you interpret what
he or she is saying. Paraphrasing involves more that repetition. To be most
effective, you should try to convey what you understand the message to mean to you.
Paraphrasing allows you to check your understanding and interpretation of what another
person had to say against they actually did mean.
Paraphrasing also provides feedback to the speaker, allowing that person to adjust the
message to clarify, expand, and/or to further explore ideas. As we have seen
previously everyone perceives messages differently. Thus, the communication
technique of paraphrasing provides a way of checking for differences.
Here are steps that you can follow in the paraphrasing process:
Focus your attention on the other person and really listen to what is said and how
it is said. Be an active listener. Focus not only on the content and meaning
of the message, but also on the nonverbal cues that the other person is giving in the
interaction.
Ask yourself what the message means to you. Put their message into your own words,
even if that is initially only in your own mind.
Restate the ideas expressed by the other person in your own words, using such phrases as:
“It seems to me that you are saying . . .” (these phrases avoid any indication
of approval or disapproval).
Wait for and listen to the other person’s response to your paraphrase.
Don’t jump in and assume that you were correct before the other person has had the
opportunity to fully respond.
Repeat the paraphrasing process until you both agree that you basically are saying the
same thing—in your own word—what the other person intended to say.
Paraphrasing should be used when you want to clarify and understand better what is being
communicated. While paraphrasing is especially useful when you wish to teach
someone, when you give or receive directions, or when you are collecting information, it
is a helpful communication tool in most every situation.
Not only does paraphrasing lead to greater clarity of messages, it also conveys to the
other person that you are interested in what they have to say and are trying to truly
understand their messages. Using paraphrasing can help to establish a more positive
communication climate and lead your employees to sharing information more readily with
you.